New @asp channel owner

After a long and fruitful reign of terror, it is my time to step down as the channel owner of #asp before either Obama or the UN decide to send a coalition to knock me out.

In the grand non-democratic tradition of #asp, the new channel owner is @dev_null. While his status won't reflect him officially as the 500 op, he is by all means in charge. We are having trouble connecting to Channel Service to fix this, so it may take a while before the new 500 op kicks in. I am of course still available, I just won't be taking part in running the channel anymore.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

Halp (yup, this still happens in 2011)

Image by pvera via Flickr* Gooch (~butt_tail@pool-96-236-196-128.pitbpa.fios.verizon.net) has joined #asp
* @Pytte (~ACIDDRY@Aciddry.users.undernet.org) Quit (Quit)
<Gooch> i had to write some classic asp today unfortuantely, but i couldnt get what i was trying to do to work. i wrote a query to select 13 offices then i did a loop like this
<Gooch> Do Until rs("Off").EOF
<Gooch> Response.Write(rsOff("officetxt"))
<Gooch> rsOff.MoveNext
<Gooch> Loop
<Gooch> actually the first line is wrong
<Gooch> Do Until rsOff.EOF
<@dev_null> you can't do that
<Gooch> what did i do wrong
<Gooch> i got the same office printing 13 times
<Gooch> instead of 13 different offices
<@dev_null> not since the lawsuit
<Gooch> what cant you do
<@dev_null> you can't loop like that any more
<Gooch> how do you loop then
<@dev_null> thank bill gates for that one
<Gooch> in classic asp
<Gooch> not .net
<@dev_null> you have to use the curly braces now
<@dev_null> yeah thats what I mean
<Gooch> where do you put those
<@dev_null> what version of mdac are you using?
<Gooch> im not sure
<Gooch> id have to look when i get to work
<@dev_null> find out
<Gooch> ok
<Gooch> i dont see why it wouldnt work though because this application has code in it from 10 years ago that still works
<@dev_null> yeah that is unchanged
<Gooch> you mean anyting new wont work?
<@dev_null> so anyway just find out what version of mdac you are on
<Gooch> ok
<Gooch> then what do i do
<@dev_null> then google that version of mdac and lawsait and the syntax will come up
<@dev_null> it is going to be with the curly braces
<@dev_null> its because the interpreter is different
<Gooch> where are the curly braces though
<@dev_null> i have not done any .net since the lawsuit so I am a little fuzzy in it
<Gooch> oh ok
<@dev_null> i went with lamp
<@dev_null> maybe one of these other guys will know the exact syntax
<Gooch> i'll look it up. thanks for the help
<@dev_null> but if you google your mdac version and the laswsuit it should come right up
<Gooch> ok cool
<@dev_null> glad to help
<@VP|bofh> who said tits?
<Gooch> ha
<@VP|bofh> what's he trying to do?
<@VP|bofh> don't tell me he is trying do until ... in asp
<@dev_null> yuah
<@VP|bofh> ok
<@VP|bofh> what version of the mdac?
<Gooch> im not sure of the version. i'll have to look tomorrow
<@VP|bofh> then you are not in a hurry
<@VP|bofh> had me worried for a second, we try to help people regardless of how fucked they are
<Gooch> haha
* Gooch (~butt_tail@pool-96-236-196-128.pitbpa.fios.verizon.net) Quit (Quit: It Takes A Village Idiot)
<@VP|bofh> it does

Happy birthday mylobean!

From someecards.com:

Last we heard mylobean was trying to slow down the passage of time by preserving himself in low-grade alcohol and expensive tobacco fumes. Everyone wish him a happy birthday!

On Jimmy Wales' scare tactics as an effective fund raising tool

"The corporate jet can't fly on unicorn farts"

-- VP|bofh

Give him a a banana

CoolGui: they are giving a canadian a gold now
VP|bofh: they are peeing on him?
Crusher_: snowboarding?
CoolGui: I don't know
CoolGui: they are inside
VP|bofh: oh, I read that as they are giving a canadian a gold shower (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urolagnia)
@Subnet: sounds about right we rock at the important events
Crusher_: ah, curling
CoolGui: I think it's the only one they won, they are just presenting it now
CoolGui: men's moguls
VP|bofh: give him a banana (http://www.southparkstudios.com/guide/1314/)
@Subnet: we got the gold at freestyle already
CoolGui: he's a frenchy
VP|bofh: that should counter the effects of the pee
Crusher_: oh, yeah, that was yesterday

Virus Protection v. Birth Control

<|anshark> so what else is going on
<Crusher-> a host got reinfected
<Crusher-> repeat offender, this time he is losing autorun
* You are now known as VP|bofh
* Crusher|work (~nothing@h96-61-44-86.mdtnwi.dsl.dynamic.tds.net) has joined #asp
* X sets channel limit to 19
<myles> Crusher|work: do y'all run virus protection there?
* Crusher- has quit (Ping timeout)
<myles> "i can't tell if i drink because she bitches or if she bitches because i drink"
<CoolGui> He told me earlier he never ran antivirus because they didn't infect him
<CoolGui> But I'm not sure if that applies to his work computer.... heh
<VP|bofh> that's sound logic
<VP|bofh> why use a condom if you have never gotten a girl pregnant before?
<CoolGui> well in his defense, I am paraphrasing

If the lawsuit is wrong, we don't want to be right

From #php:
carlsb3rg: can I use ms access with php?
+tlf: Sure, why not?
carlsb3rg: wasn't there some kind of lawsuit?
+benkillin: wtf
+benkillin: YOU FUCKING
+benkillin: YOU ARE A
+benkillin: OMG
+benkillin: A
+benkillin: TROLL
+benkillin: !~@(&*$(&@TRKJFDFKLJH
+tlf: huh?
carlsb3rg: :)